Martin Beck Nworah Monday, January 02, 2017 2
LETTER OF "WETIN DEY DO YOU SEF"
My name is Martin Beck Nworah and I am the Chairman of Eligible Bachelors Ti Take Over Club of Nigeria (EBTTOCON). Your husband reported you to our association and we wish to ask you some questions.
Before you got married, you were calling your husband all sorts of sweet names capable of causing diabetes...sugar, honey, saccharine, hubby, sweetie et al. But when you got married, you started calling him "ogam". Chai, chai... Oga? Are you an apprentice? Soon you will give birth and he is afraid you will change it from Ogam to Papa bomboy. This is highly unacceptable. You called him sweet names before marriage, please continue with that. He is not your Oga, you're not under employment. He is your partner, don't make him a demigod.
Also, you husband told MBN in confidence that you serve him food and wait till he finishes before you eat your own. Or sometimes, you chop in the kitchen. Eiyaaaa, baby girl, that is not respect na. Before you people married, you used to feed him with your hand and kiss while chopping the food sef. Where has your certificate in 'Food Romanciology' gone to? C'mon, you need to chop with him. Even if the nature of your work doesn't permit, make out time maybe twice or thrice in a week to chop together and do food romance. Your husband said he likes it and even Martin Beck Nworah has verified this from some of his adventures before he married you.
My sister, this one is heartbreaking. It is about your skills in bedmatics. Your husband told our association that before he married you, you were snake in the monkey shadow. You were super flexible, adapted to any style and blew his mind away. But since after marriage, you started chopping food and forgot about your skills. Now you just lie there as a big log of wood and allow him to do all the work. You no longer make all those small small sounds that makes him want to cum. Chai, our wife, check am na. Is that how you used to do? Now if he starts going after all these skilled under 20 girls in the universities, you will start complaining. C'mon baby girl, do something. If you have forgotten some of your skills, book a date with Martin Beck Nworah and he will brush up your skills...free of charge.
You already know your single female friends must be kept at arm's length abi? Especially those ones who talked about the generosity and good heart of your husband during the wedding. They may want to taste his goodness in his private chambers.
I would've told you everything your husband complained about today but, let's leave it for another day. Go and work on these ones first.
Bye bye. And stop wearing that cloth that covers all your assets. Show him some skin biko, he is free to gaze at your boobs and bumbum. If he doesn't, who will?
Till we get to the Promised Land, I shall be waiting for when you will pass me a glass of water and thank God for the gift of grace for the race.